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  • Essay / Coping with Grief: “Dealing with Grief” and “Big Boy Leaves Home”

    Traumatic events leave an unforgettable mark on people. Often, it is how people deal with the trauma that determines how they will move on with their lives. “Dealing with Grief” by Bharati Mukherjee deals with the plane bombing that left many people dead and how the families of these people cope with the grief they have to face. Richard Wright's "Big Boy Leaves Home" follows Big Boy as he flees after killing a white soldier who murdered two of his friends. As he tries to hide and survive, he must also mourn his friends. Both stories focus on tragedy and grief, and the way these characters grieve reflects the realities that affect everyone. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on “Why Violent Video Games Should Not Be Banned”? Get the original essayMukherjee begins his story by setting up a chaotic scene. Many are gathered at Sheila's house to try to make sense of a plane that was allegedly off-grid but rumored to have had a terrorist bomb. To understand the intensity of the situation, Mukherjee writes: “Two radios are working in the dining room. They are tuned to different channels... The big television in the den is broadcast at full speed on American networks and cable channels. (156) The description of this scene shows how no one knows or understands what is really happening. Everyone is trying to stay tuned to the media to see if they hear about what happened to the plane. As the story continues to develop, readers get a sense of the despair and hysteria that develops between Sheila and the other characters, because deep down, they may have realized that their loved ones don't would not come back. Mukherjee continues to write: “I wonder if the pills alone explain this calm. No peace, just deafening calm. I have always been controlled, but never repressed. The sound can reach me, but my body is tense, ready to scream. (157) Although it seems that Sheila is in denial, it seems that her mind and body have accepted the sad truth that will soon befall them. This is unfortunately a universal reality. Tragedy is never an easy subject to accept, especially if it means losing the time of many loved ones. Denial is usually the first step many people take because they cannot accept death and would rather be wrong until proven otherwise. However, once people come out of denial, it doesn't make acceptance easier, as they try to come to terms with the reality that their loved ones will not come back and that they may not have had the chance to tell them at first. review correctly. and the characters learn that the plane was indeed bombed and that everyone is dead, so they have to go identify the bodies. From there, many experienced their grief in different ways. Mukherjee goes on to write: “Kusum has put his house up for sale… Pam has left for California… Dr. Ranganathan… changes jobs and goes to Ottawa. But Ottawa is more than a hundred miles away, and he is obliged to travel two hundred and twenty miles a day. He can't bring himself to sell his house. (165) Sheila believed that Kusum was running away, although she justified it by saying that she was seeking inner peace. Readers can argue that Sheila might have felt the same way about Pam, who also moved to a new place to start over. However, disconnecting from the place that is causing the grief is an approach taken by many. Coming back to a place full of memories becomesoften too much for them to bear, so leaving that place behind and starting over with a clean slate is their way of coping with grief without having to constantly bring up memories of people who were no longer with them. As for Sheila, she experienced the death of her husband and two children in a strange way. During a visit to India, her husband spoke to her. Mukherjee writes: “Should I stay? I ask, but already the image is fading. You must finish alone what we started together. (164) Sheila's husband asked her as soon as she died to continue living, even if she was alone. To do this, Sheila returned to Canada to resume her life as best she could, even if it was still difficult for her to accept. Once she received a sign from her husband that she had done what he had asked, Sheila then fully felt that she could begin to truly live and overcome such a sad time in her life. The tragedy that follows Big Boy is very different. about what happened with Sheila. It started innocently enough when Big Boy and his friends Bobo, Buck and Lester decided to skip class and enter a private area to go swimming. What started as innocent fun quickly escalated when they were seen by a white woman who screamed because she felt her life was in danger. Although they did their best to assure him that they just wanted to grab their clothes and leave, they didn't escape that easily. Due to her screams, her partner, Jim, who is also a soldier, arrives with a gun and threatens to kill them all. Wright writes: “Lester groaned, stiffened, and leaned forward. His forehead hit the toes of the woman's shoes... Buck stopped at the edge of the embankment, his head tilted back, his body bent stiffly to the side; he fell headlong, sending a shower of bright spray towards the sun. ("Big Boy Leaves Home") Jim ends up shooting and killing two of the boys. Since everything happened so quickly, Big Boy and Bobo may not have had time to understand what had happened to their friends, especially if they were trying to escape to save their own lives. Since they lived at a time when Jim Crow laws were still in effect, they had no choice but to flee to avoid being lynched. Nonetheless, tragedy followed him as he continued his journey. Big Boy ran until he felt he was a safe distance away, then hid in a hole in the ground until the coast was clear. However, the mob that wanted to lynch Big Boy and Bobo quickly found its way to him, and Big Boy feared for his own life, along with Bobo, as he was expected to join him soon. Unfortunately, the mob eventually caught Bobo and burned him alive with tar. Wright continues to write: “Big Boy could see the cannon surrounded by flames... His eyes were looking at a long dark spot near the fire... This dark spot had moved. Lawd, it's Bobo... He smelled the tar, faint at first, then stronger. The wind brought him in the face, then carried him away. ("Big Boy Leaves Home") The death of his last friend was ultimately too much for Big Boy to accept. He must have felt very alone, especially since he had to leave his family behind, and ultimately even put them in danger. to get hurt. Having to face the death of all his friends in such a short time and in extremely cruel circumstances did not allow Big Boy to truly accept the despair he felt. Wright described: “He had no feeling, no fear. He was numb, empty, as if all the blood had been drained from him. ("Big Boy Leaves Home") Considering that Big Boy had witnessed death so close to him, it is entirely appropriate that he had entered a state 2015.